Lobster Land by Susan Carlton

Lobsterland, By Susan Carlton, is about a 16 year old who is forced to grow up before her time. Charlotte lives on an island off the coast of Maine that she calls "Bleak". She feels trapped by her environment and her life. Her dad is always playing Scrabble --“scrabble sex” as Charlotte calls it -- with Lola the Laptop. Her Mom is always on medication, not a druggie, but in her own little world. That leaves Charlotte to take care "the siblets" while she juggles her school and personal life. Stressed out, Charlotte applies to prep school hoping to get away. She seems to wear her high heels everywhere in an effort to symbolize the life she wants.

I had a hard time understanding why Charlotte was soo in love with her boyfriend, Noah. His character wasn't really developed until the end. Yeah, they had known each other for a long time, (they used to eat play-doh when they were still ignorant little children) but I never read anything that I thought was particularly sweet or gentlemanlike of him. Nothing that would capture my heart, but maybe that's just me.

I had a really hard time getting into the book partly because I expected it to be a really girly, cliquey book. As you probably guessed...I was slightly wrong. This is a book about the desire for indepence and change versus leaving everything you know and care about. I am left with a vision of high-heeled Charlotte in the ice and snow, still stuck on an island off the east coast. I kind of admire the fact that she didn't fall and break herself, then again if she had, it would have been quite hilariously funny.

Overall...I give this book a 2.5 daggers out of 5.





Still typing, reading and yours,

--Twyla Lee

Teen Read Week

Happy Teen Read Week, everybody! Hmm. I guess we cousins should start reading, huh?

Teen Read Week is... presented by? Sponsored by? Held by? ________ by ALA (The American Library Association). This year's theme is LOL.

No, really. Like the internet abbreviation.

Please excuse me. I have to go curl up in a corner and cry.

But other than the atrocious (in my opinion) theme, Teen Read Week is pretty darn awesome. Teenagers should read more.

Readingly, curling-up-and-cryingly yours,






Note: You can see my further thoughts on lol, and some other stuff, here.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

Originally, we were going to refrain from reviewing Harry Potter the Seventh. But then we began to feel so very, very left out. So here it goes: Harry Potter is a character that many of us have grown up with. We wanted his final story to end spectacularly. Alas, it was not to be. I suppose that Rowling, being richer than the queen and knowing that her legions of loyal readers would buy the book no matter what, decided that she could cop out on the final volume. This is incredibly sad. I wanted to like the book. Truly I did. But somehow, it didn't work.

I was actually racing with one of my cousins (of the non-evil sort) to finish the book (I won, of course), so I didn't realise how disappointed I was until I gave it some thought. And there it was, the awful truth: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is a creature of deathly boredom.

And OH! The epilogue. Of all the things that could have gone wrong, this was the worst. How could she make everything so...perfect? I shall refrain from saying anything more on the subject, for fear of being hunted down and butchered by a vengeful not-yet-finished reader.

Despite the fact that this Deathly Boredom was so...well, deathly, I feel that I must give it no less than three out of five daggers. Just because I grew up with the series. And the first three books were totally made of awesome.

--Avery Trelaine





Aislinn says,

So, unlike Avery, I am going to assume that everyone reading this had read Harry Potter and the Deathly Boredom, er, that is, Hallows.

SPOILER ALERT!! If you are one of the, like, four people who haven't yet finished, don't read this . . .

I'm going to do this by character, because... because because.

Harry-- Our dear main character was as much of an annoying angst-ridden idiot as always. Only this time, he was an annoying, angst-ridden idiot who was also Jesus. And has anyone else noticed that he's not that good at magic? No, seriously. I mean, who in their right mind would make him head of the auror department? (This is what he goes on to do-- JKR said so.) I was so depressed that he didn't die.

Ron-- Went from being kind of a pathetic loser to being entirely a pathetic loser.

Hermione-- Lost all her awesome. No, really. She went from being all "Get out of my way or I'll turn you into a moose" to "Oh, Ron, you're soooo clever! And also, I'm suddenly not nearly as competent a witch as I used to be!"

Ginny-- If Harry Potter dumped me 'for my safety,' I would most certainly not just sit around and wait for him to come back to me. Then again, I wouldn't date Harry Potter in the first place. Also, JKR tells us that Ginny became a professional Quiddich player, but then left her job when she married Harry. No, Ginny! No! Don't let patriarcial society keep you down! BREAK THE GLASS CEILING!!

Malfoy-- Most certainly did not live up to his potential. He could have been so awesome, but instead, he was just a whiney, incompetent loser. I would also like to take this opportunity to note that if Draco had, in fact, fufilled his potential for awesome, he and Ginny would have made a great couple. (Hey, don't look at me like that. It's true.)

Dumbledore-- The Headmaster was dead, yes. But he was in the book more than any other, except perhaps the sixth. I think JKR simply couldn't fathom writing a Harry Potter book without Dumbledore.

THE DEATHSTICK-- Yes, it's a wand, but it really deserves its own character listing. It had so much personality. And also, it's called the deathstick. And Voldy always said "Deathstick" last, like: "It is mine! The Elder Wand! The Wand Of Destiny! THE DEATHSTICK!!!"*. At which point I always burst into a fit of hysterical laughter (no matter how serious the situation was supposed to be).

*This is not an actual quote from Deathly Hallows. But it's pretty darn close.

Dissapointedly, cynically, thanking-God-it's-over,

Note: We know that this post is seeming to be spreading the HP hate. But really, we love it as much as all you crazy fangirls. Okay, maybe not quite as much. As in, we don't write any Dramione fanfiction. Or any fanfiction, for that matter.
But still. We love Harry Potter. We just hide it really, really well.


Twyla says:

Now for my opion of this wonderfulness. Well, I thought it was ok. I wasnt thrilled with it but there were certain parts I liked. It was pretty, ok very predictable. Especially the ending. The very very end, 19 years later, it was waaay to perfect and like *sigh* aw, how sweet. Lets all go to bed and have sweet dreams because everyone lived happily ever after. After all of what Harry went though, wouldn't he have some emotional drawbacks he needed to work on? Or insane fans he had to outrun?

After saying that, I give Deathly Hallows a 3.5 daggers out of 5.

--Twyla Lee

Looking For Alaska

Looking for Alaska is John Green's first book (his second, An Abundance of Katherines, shall be reviewed forthwith). Looking for Alaska is a rather heartbreaking story. There is, of course, a boy and a girl, but there's also a boarding school and some alcohol and a suitcase labeled "COFFEE TABLE" and many last words. Miles Halter (the boy) goes to boarding school and meets Alaska (the girl) and a bunch of cool stuff happens, none of which I will tell you about, because I'm cruel. Then a Bad Thing happens, also which I will not tell you about.

Looking for Alaska is divided into two parts-- before and after-- and the chapters are named accordingly (a month before, two days before, etc). This gives the whole book a sense of inevitability. There is a Bad Thing that is about to happen, and you can see it coming, but there is nothing whatsoever that you can do about it. Of course, there is never anything that you can do to stop something that happens in a book, unless you are the author of the book, or you have magical powers, but Looking for Alaska really drives the point home. The entire first 3/4 of the book is just building up to the Bad Thing, just waiting for it to happen. And then, BAM. Bad Thing. And it hurts your soul, believe me.

Now, look at the picture of the cover. Do you see the shiny round gold thing? Yes? Good. That, dear reader, is a Printz award, which, if you don't know, is a very fancy sort of an award. Looking for Alaska won a Printz (a fact that you may have surmised from the aforementioned shiny round gold thing). Why did it win a Printz, you ask? Silly reader! I say. Because it is good! Now go, go out into the wonderful land of books and read it. I command you!

I award this book 4.5 daggers.*






Depressedly, Bad-Thing-hatingly yours,





*I should probably give it five, but there's too much drinking. Is that a legitimate reason to take away a half a dagger? Eh. Teenage drinking is annoying.
__________________________________________________________


Despite all of the teen drinking and sex and smoking, I absolutely adore this book. It is a beautiful story of love and loss and suffering. And it made me cry. It absolutely ripped my heart out. And one must love a book that can do that.

The inevitability of the Bad Thing really hits you, though.

Hits you hard.

I give it the only set of daggers that I am able: all five.



Hoping for good last words...

Wicked Lovely

Wicked Lovely is the story of a girl who can see faeries. Not shiny, happy, sparkly, petal-wearing fairies—scary ones. Thus the spelling: fairy = Tinkerbell, faery = awesome. And of course, by awesome I mean, you know. Frightening.

Aislinn (That’s the girl’s name. Coincidentally, it is also my name. It’s pronounced Ash-lin, not Ah-is-lin, or Ay-es-lin, or Bill, or however one chooses to butcher it.) catches the eye of a faery named Keenan, who turns out to be something called the Summer King. This makes him an important person (or faerie). He’s also kind of a jerk. Keenan has been searching for a bride for nine centuries (faeries are immortal, if you were wondering) and thinks that Aislinn may be the one. I won’t go into all the details, but, basically, Aislinn is given a choice: become a Summer Girl (one of many simpering idiots who die if they go too far from Keenan), or take a test. Obviously, I’m not talking about a math test. It’s a magical test. You know, like slaying a dragon or pulling a sword out of a stone (though slaying a dragon is more about brute strength and/or battle prowess). If Aislinn passes, she becomes the Summer Queen, Keenan’s bride (also, a curse gets broken and some other stuff happens, but I won’t go into that). If she fails, she becomes the Winter Girl, forced to endure constant cold and bound to serve the Winter Queen (who is evil, of course). And no, I’m not going to tell you what the test is. You’ll have to read the book. It isn’t slaying a dragon, though.

Anyhow, while all this is going on, Aislinn is getting into a romantic entanglement with a boy named Seth. Unlike Keenan, Seth is wonderful. He is also mine—sorry, Avery dear. Seth lives in a train car. And has tattoos. And a snake. Also, he’s hot. And did I mention mine?

Wicked Lovely is Melissa Marr’s first novel, and she had better write more now, because it is most absolutely utterly wonderful fantabulous. It starts out a little slow, with a scene that is supposed to introduce you to the concept of faeries and the fact that Aislinn can see them. But Aislinn’s fear at seeing them seems a bit forced—she’s been seeing them all her life, and you’d figure she’d be used to it. The book recovers quickly, though, and has very few weak moments after that. There were some times when I wanted to scream at the characters because they were making bad decisions and don’t be stupid and ack don’t do that you idiot because can’t you see that other thing? But I’m not sure that this is bad. I scream at characters a lot, see.
I give this book 4.5 daggers out of 5.





Sincerely, book-reviewingly, Seth-kidnappingly, faery-lovingly yours,





Faeries have been a part of my life (self? soul?) since I was very, very young. Because of this, I just happen to have an affinity for books about them. Often, I will be excited about a book on the subject of faeries, only to be monumentally disappointed. Fortunately, however, this was not so with Melissa Marr's 'Wicked Lovely'.

The book, as Aislinn (Nyx, not the main character) stated, began shakily with an awkward "I see fairies" scene. It recovered quickly, plunging the reader into an epic clash between winter and summer, love and obligation, mortal and faery. You know... everything that my daily life would be if it weren't... normal.

One thing that I really loved about this book was its love story. The high ranking fae creature verses the best friend is a common love conflict/scenario, popular among many fantasy writers. The great thing about Wicked Lovely is that Marr took a common theme and made it original and complex. And entirely awesome.

(And actually, Aislinn darling, Seth is not yours. He may not be mine, but if I can not have him, neither can you. So there.)

All in all, Wicked Lovely was, well... lovely.
I pierce the icy heart of the Winter Queen with four and a half daggers.





Fae at heart...

Stardust by Neil Gaiman

Stardust is the tale of Tristran Thorn’s quest to find the Fallen Star for his love, who promised him anything he desired if he were to achieve the impossible task. Tristran does end up finding the star, but gets more than he bargained for -- he is not the only one searching for it. The evil witch queen is after the heart of the star, for the star is actually a gorgeous young woman and eating her heart will make the witch queen young and powerful again.

Some who are reading this review probably have already watched the movie, but the book and the movie are two completely separate things. The book had more adventure than the movie and ended better, in my opinion. I will give the movie props for being funnier though.


In the book, I enjoyed the way Neil Gaiman switched points of views throughout the story. I liked reading the witch’s perspective and getting into her thoughts because, personally, I haven’t read many books like that.


I give Stardust 5 daggers out of 5. I felt that all the loose ends from the beginning of the book got tied into perfectly neat bows.


Keep an eye for more reviews.

--Twyla Lee





Well, for once Twyla and I agree on the quality of a book. That's interesting.
Anyhow, I adored Stardust. Neil Gaiman is masterful in his storytelling and the world that he created in this book was simply marvellous. Somehow, he managed to make the entire book heartbreaking within the very last paragraph.
Genius, really.

I give the book five daggers (of five) worthy of cutting out the heart of a star.

Read on....Avery Trelaine





Oh my! Total consensus! Whatever shall we do?

I think that this unprecedented event comes on account of the fact that Stardust is indisputably, fantastically amazing. To take a cue from the Uglies trilogy, it is happy-making.

Stardust managed to make me extraordinarily happy and then completely rip my heart out. How, you ask? Do not ask. Read.

Also, I need to see the movie. I'm told that there's a cross-dressing Robert De Niro.

Five of five, but of course.

Happily, sadly, starrily, wonderingly, agreeingly yours,

Aislinn Ai

SO YESTERDAY by Scott Westerfeld

I was already a Scott Westerfeld fan when I read the Uglies series. So I assumed I’d like this book, SO YESTERDAY. The main character, a teen named Hunter, is paid to seek out the next fashion trends. I think it's a must-read for all teens because we're constantly trying to keep up with the latest trends. Having read this, I'll think twice before hopping on board the next fad.

While out hunting for potential fads, Trendsetter Hunter runs into Jen -- an Innovator. Innovators are the teens who come up with the new fashion trends through their own natural creativity. Hunter introduces Jen to the focus group he works for. The next evening they are supposed to meet Hunter's boss, Mandy, at an abandoned building, but they only find her cell phone and a mysterious cache of the most amazing new type of shoes -- shoes everyone will want. Enter the Jammers. Jammers want to thwart the Big Businesses making money off teen fads. This book made me realize how people are brainwashed by the media to want certain brands. We are made to think a certain way and to think that certain things are cooler or, "more skate" than others.

Like, Hunter, by the end of this book I ended up being all for the Jammers. I give this book 4.5 daggers out of 5. I think that I would have really loved the book if the Jammers were a little bit more powerful because cool is overrated in my eyes.





--Twyla Lee


Don't get me wrong...I love Scott Westerfeld. The Uglies/Pretties/Specials series was absolutely bloody brilliant. That being said, I found myself highly disappointed in SO YESTERDAY. Sure, the book was entertaining...but there wasn't much else to it. Nothing in the book really stirred me. I didn't care if the characters succeeded...hell, I didn't really care if they died. Somehow, neither the story or the main characters captured my imagination or interest in any significant way.

All in all, I felt that somewhere along the line Westerfeld lost the power of the message he was trying to convey. I already knew that we teenagers are brainwashed by the corporations and brand names every single day. No great epiphany was spawned during the reading of this book.

I give this book three daggers of the available five.

Brutally Honest......